Today in 3 Panels, by Dean Mang-Wooley

Hannah is watching Dean play the game Earthworm Jim on the Super Nintendo. Hannah says: "I think Earthworm Jim is an ESFP. With seriously un-diagnosed ADHD."

Earthworm Jim

Sep 21, 2008

A stranger starts talking to Dean on a path. The stranger says: "Excuse me, does this path lead to the water?" Dean replies: "Yes. I think so? The water is kind of...diagonal from here." The stranger says: "But I can get to the boats from here?" Dean replies: "Yes. Maybe? Douglas...uh, Dallas street...Dallas road will take you there." Dean starts sweating and thinks to themself: "6 years I've lived in this city and I still can't give directions."

Directions

Sep 9, 2016

Dean is taking care of two dogs. Dean and their brother Jordan are standing near the living room. Jordan is pointing at something. Jordan says to Dean: "Maybe we should'e let them out more than once?" There is a close up image revealing three pieces of dog poop on the living room carpet. Dean looks horrified.

Adventures in dogsitting, part II

Aug 11, 2008

Dean and Jordan are talking to each other in their living room. Dean says: "imagine if cats had hands like ours." Jordan replies: "Ew." Dean says: "Or! Imagine if they had faces like ours, but everything else was the same." Jordan replies: "No!" Dean imagines a cat with a man's face and says: "Just imagine it for a second."

Cat hands

Aug 29, 2008

Dean, aka Rita, describes what they observe at a church service. Image text reads: Staring at what looks like malignant melanoma on the neck of the woman in front of me. Listening to a surprisingly beautiful rendition of Ave Maria on the trombone. Watching a flash of light dance in time to the music.

One Sunday in Melville

Aug 3, 2008

Dean is looking for their cellphone charger. Panel 1: Dean is opening a drawer in the kitchen and shouting over their shoulder. They say: "I can't find my..." Panel 2: Dean has a look of annoyed concentration on their face. They are miming the action of plugging a charger into a cellphone. They say: "Phone...plug...in..." Panel 3: an image of a bottle of ritalin with cobwebs all over it, signifying the fact that Dean has not taken ritalin in some time.

Adventures in pharmaceuticals I

Sep 7, 2008

Dean's family is eating dinner together. Dean's dad says: "Dad had a stroke..." Having not heard him, Dean's mom says to Jordan: "Could I have some of your gravy, Jord?" Dean's dad looks down at the table and says: "Never mind."

Stroke

Sep 12, 2008

Panel 1 image: a life-drawing model undoes their robe. Panel 1 text: There's a brief moment of tension right before a model takes their clothes off. Panel 2 image: the model sits naked on a fabric-covered block, holding a walking stick. Panel 2 text: But once they're naked, it's fine. Panel 3 image: the model stands facing a student. The two are talking to each other. Panel 3 text: Still, it's bizarre to see the other students talking to them.

Life drawing

Sep 24, 2008

Dean is at the cashier's desk at an art supply store. Image text reads: "At the art supply store, I suddenly began to pass out. As the room shifted around me, I sank to the floor in a cold sweat. The clerk was good about it." The clerk says to Dean: "Are you hiding?"

Fainting in the aisles

Aug 6, 2008

Dean's mom is serving the family a casserole. She says to Dean's dad: "Be careful of the casserole...It's got a lot of--" Dean's dad interrupts and says: "Nails?"

Interruption

Sep 6, 2008

Dean is walking down a residential street. They say to themself: "whoa." They think: "This year, Jordan turned 16 on the 16th and Hannah and I turned 20 on the 20th." They smile wide and think: "COSMIC!"

Cosmic

Sep 18, 2008

Panel 1 image: a car parked outside of ACAD. Panel 1 text: My little brother picked me up from school today. Panel 2 image: Dean loads their school supplies into the back seat of the car. Panel 2 text: Which is about as embarrassing as it sounds. Panel 3 image: Dean sits in the passenger seat of the car, looking out the window. Their brother Jordan is in the driver's seat. Panel 3 text: I NEED to get my friggin' license!

License shame

Oct 1, 2008