Today in 3 Panels, by Dean Mang-Wooley

Dean is lying in bed, awake. Suddenly, they think about the art commission that they have to finish soon. They say to themself: "I'm dead."

Dread

Sep 4, 2008

Panel 1: Dean does sit-ups. Panel 2: Dean lifts a dumbbell, sweating and looking exhausted. Panel 3: Dean sits on the couch and eats a slice of pie.

Working out

Sep 8, 2008

Panel one: Dean's brother Jordan belches loudly, making a grotesque face. Panel two: Jordan makes a face and says: "ugh." Panel three: Jordan says: "I've been belching non-stop ever since I ate that sausage sandwich." Text at the bottom explains what a sausage sandwich is: "2 full sausages between 2 slices of bread."

Sausage sandwich

Aug 19, 2008

Dean is on the main floor of their house. They hear their dad yell from the basement: "Something down here just REEKS!" Dean goes down to the basement and thinks: "I don't smell anything." They smell their own underarm and think: "Maybe it smells exactly like me."

Reek

Sep 17, 2008

Dean is watching the news with their family. Panel 1: the newscaster on TV says: "Large Hadron Collider..." Panel 2: The TV shows a simulation of what would happen if a black hole opened up on Earth. The Earth's crust is crumbling and the core is exposed. Panel 3: Close up of Dean's face. They are sweating with fear.

Doom

Sep 10, 2008

Dean is sitting in a restaurant with their friends Sam and Lailah. Sam says: "I'm advising everyone I know to get a tattoo. The pain builds and builds, and then it just drops off and everything feels beautiful." Lailah says to Sam: "You'd make a terrible torture victim."

Tattoos

Sep 1, 2008

Dean is talking to their coworker, who is also named Dean. Dean says: "Hi Dean." Dean responds with: "Hi Dean." A third coworker joins them and says: "Hi Deans."

The Dean Team

Aug 18, 2018

Dean is talking to their mom on her birthday. Dean says: "You are 48 years old. How do you feel?" Dean's mom says: "Old. My sister didn't get to be 45."

Birthday blues

Oct 13, 2008

Dean's mom is serving the family a casserole. She says to Dean's dad: "Be careful of the casserole...It's got a lot of--" Dean's dad interrupts and says: "Nails?"

Interruption

Sep 6, 2008

Dean is in class. One of their classmates says: "saying that our notion of beauty is a 'white' notion of beauty...that's like...comparing a garden with a dump." Dean angrily whips their head around to face their classmate and thinks: "What the FUCK?"

Classroom racism

Sep 19, 2008

Adventures in pharmaceuticals III

Adventures in pharmaceuticals III

Apr 9, 2016

Dean, aka Rita, describes what they observe at a church service. Image text reads: Staring at what looks like malignant melanoma on the neck of the woman in front of me. Listening to a surprisingly beautiful rendition of Ave Maria on the trombone. Watching a flash of light dance in time to the music.

One Sunday in Melville

Aug 3, 2008