Today in 3 Panels, by Dean Mang-Wooley

Panel 1 text: A note about Stampede season. Panel 2 image: 3 police officers standing together. Panel 2 text: Cops: scary. Panel 3 image: the same 3 police officers standing together, wearing cowboy hats. Panel 3 text: Cops in cowboy hats: exponentially scarier.

Stampede season

Jul 16, 2018

Dean is in their back yard, using a hose to spray water onto a pile of dirt. Dean thinks: "My only goal right now is to turn this pile of dirt into a pile of mud." There is a close up image of the water hitting the pile of dirt, followed by a close up image of Dean's head. Dean's eyes are closed, and their mind is empty.

Pre-housesitting meditation

Aug 7, 2008

Dean, aka Rita, describes what they observe at a church service. Image text reads: Staring at what looks like malignant melanoma on the neck of the woman in front of me. Listening to a surprisingly beautiful rendition of Ave Maria on the trombone. Watching a flash of light dance in time to the music.

One Sunday in Melville

Aug 3, 2008

Dean is working as a cashier at a cafe. They have a new haircut. A regular customer approaches Dean and says: "I like your haircut. Do you feel brave today?" Dean says: "I don't know. I feel like the haircut is more daring than I am." The customer replies: "That's great. Now you can live into that daring."

Bravery

Jul 5, 2015

Dean and their dad are cleaning in the basement of Dean's old school. Panel 1: Dean's dad holds a plastic bag in front of his face and says: "Qu'est-ce que the hell est this?" Panel 2: Close up image of the plastic bag's contents. A dried-out, moldy piece of fruit. Image text reads: "Maybe it was a mango?" Panel 3: Image of a table with a large stain on it. Image text reads: "After a year or so in the school's basement, its juices had coagulated into a dark brown tar on one of the tables."

A mystery

Aug 21, 2008

Dean is at the cashier's desk at an art supply store. Image text reads: "At the art supply store, I suddenly began to pass out. As the room shifted around me, I sank to the floor in a cold sweat. The clerk was good about it." The clerk says to Dean: "Are you hiding?"

Fainting in the aisles

Aug 6, 2008

Dean is looking for their cellphone charger. Panel 1: Dean is opening a drawer in the kitchen and shouting over their shoulder. They say: "I can't find my..." Panel 2: Dean has a look of annoyed concentration on their face. They are miming the action of plugging a charger into a cellphone. They say: "Phone...plug...in..." Panel 3: an image of a bottle of ritalin with cobwebs all over it, signifying the fact that Dean has not taken ritalin in some time.

Adventures in pharmaceuticals I

Sep 7, 2008

A stranger starts talking to Dean on a path. The stranger says: "Excuse me, does this path lead to the water?" Dean replies: "Yes. I think so? The water is kind of...diagonal from here." The stranger says: "But I can get to the boats from here?" Dean replies: "Yes. Maybe? Douglas...uh, Dallas street...Dallas road will take you there." Dean starts sweating and thinks to themself: "6 years I've lived in this city and I still can't give directions."

Directions

Sep 9, 2016

Panel 1 image: Dean as a child looking toward the right with an awed expression. Panel 1 text: When I was really young, I had a very strong emotional response to Rick Moranis. Panel 2 image: 3 portraits of actor Rick Moranis portraying Seymour in Little Shop of Horrors; Doug McKenzie on SCTV; and Wayne Szalinsky in Honey, I Shrunk the Kids. Panel 2 text: Seeing him evoked a feeling that was simultaneously positive and negative--a mixture of reverence, recognition, and embarrassment. Panel 3 image: a portrait that is half Dean as a child, half Rick Moranis. Panel 3 text: I felt like we were the same person, living two different stages of the same life.

Rick Moranis

May 5, 2018

Panel 1: Dean is turning compost with a pitchfork at night, looking sad. Panel 2: Dean leans on the pitchfork and starts crying, saying: "huh..huh...oh god..." Panel 3: close up of an unopened bottle of celexa, an antidepressant, with cobwebs all over it.

Adventures in pharmaceuticals II

Sep 11, 2008

Dean is at the cashier's desk at an art supply store. Image text reads: "At the art supply store, I suddenly began to pass out. As the room shifted around me, I sank to the floor in a cold sweat. The clerk was good about it." The clerk says to Dean: "Are you hiding?"

Fainting in the aisles

Aug 6, 2008

Dean is in their back yard, using a hose to spray water onto a pile of dirt. Dean thinks: "My only goal right now is to turn this pile of dirt into a pile of mud." There is a close up image of the water hitting the pile of dirt, followed by a close up image of Dean's head. Dean's eyes are closed, and their mind is empty.

Pre-housesitting meditation

Aug 7, 2008